nah-dah

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nah, i didnt get the psc open scholarship. now they’re giving me false hope by letting me know that they sent my applications to the ministries for approval. guess thats not going to happen either, considering the vast number of competitors with 5-6-7As getting rejected for the open scholarship as well cos they dont have a prominent cca record.

go away la stupid smart people trying to steal scholarship from a needy girl like me.

anyway, someone got promoted in the office today and the entire atmosphere changed into a piercing bitter silence followed by a hypocritical round of applause as the AVP annouced the news. afterwhich, people started to question their superiors why they weren’t picked.

lol speaking of the office. i most certainly need to talk about a particular colleague, lets call her LOF – loud, obnoxious, fart, simply because she’s loud, obnoxious, and likes to fart.

LOF used to sit right opposite me for the past 2 months. and omg, she is the loudest person i know! she brings up the most retarded conversation topics, like how malays and indians always have alot of kids, and how dog meat is served.

lol and she tells her stories like she’s actually discovered that cancer and AIDs can BOTH be cured by peeing on oneself. and she’s completely oblivious to the fact that her colleagues are obviously being polite when they pretend to be disbelieving of her absurd accounts. then she will exclaim very loudly,
“是真的! 我没有骗你!”

haha like the time when she proudly told everyone that one of her customers emailed her an advertisement for a matchmaking website.
是真的! 我没有骗你! How does he know that i’m not married? i really shouldn’t have deleted the email so fast. must go and see what kind of guys he has to offer”

and i suppose the guys on the website would rather go out with hundred year old decomposing corpses than with her.

thats not all.
once, someone recounted the experience of having prawns for lunch with LOF. prawn juice was dripping down the length of LOF’s arm as she peeled it. and just in front of everyone else, she began to drag her tongue across the inside of her arm from bottom to top, following after the trail of prawn juice.

WTF!!

another recounted following after LOF to the toilets. and LOF probably had a bad case of fart gas that she couldnt wait to let go in privacy. so she just popped every single fart along the way to the toilet. and there wasnt just one of them, but multiple, small farts that would send anyone into fits of laughter if not for the fact that they were spasming on the floor and gasping for air.

at her table, LOF simply lets out loud monstrous burps and yawns louder than lion king. and on some days, LOF really looks like she came fresh out of the night safari with her giraffe-patterned blouse and pants. on other days, she wears high waisted jeans, which cause her tummy fats to dangle precariously, and baggy shirts that emphasizes her saggy boobs.

she’s really so ugly that when you look under your bed,
you see her.

LOF also likes to pick her nose openly and rather vigourously. i would imagine that if you could bear to observe her for 5 more minutes, she’d have rolled her noseshit into a nice round ball and stuck it into her mouth to chew on.

thankfully, the entire ordeal with LOF is nearly gone. and i say that because they moved her to a corner seat because she was way too distracting for her neighbours. so shes completely out of sight, but still not out of mind because she talks so damn loudly.

now for the bitchface to come back to work after prolonged medical leave.

wah lao i had to stay back to move her things yesterday okay. accidentally knocked over her mug full of water (wtf havent even cleaned out since a month ago!!) while trying to plug the wires into the PC. hope something happened to her computer. thankfully also, bitchface has also been relocated far far away from me. no longer will i have to endure her piercing voice and walking over to suck up to the boss at the table behind me.

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